MEDIA RELEASE: Do Not Suspend The Constitution, Hilda!

 Download Link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1jEXkFsQAOp9Q9CgDADgLyOJcTt8bVKC1/view?usp=drive_link

In a hastily drafted media release, Unlisted Thoughts strongly urges the President of the Republic of the Marshall Islands, Her Excellency Hilda Heine, to not suspend the Constitution of the Republic of the Marshall Islands (the Constitution), not take drastic actions to restore public security, and not rule by decree as a defensive measure against communist acts of violence endangering the state.

Unlisted Thoughts was saddened to learn that on the morning of 26 August 2025, the Nitijela Parliament Building was ablaze. Unlisted Thoughts expresses to the Marshallese our condolence and our gratitude that no-one was killed in the inferno.

However, when legislative buildings burn down, most heads of state and even more heads of government become tempted to suspend articles of their constitution, restrict civil liberties, halt freedom of the press, and imprison people for life. Unlisted Thoughts recognises the allure of this, especially when in response to alleged communist agitators.
President Heine must be strong and resist this urge.

As we all know, Section 18 of Article II of the Constitution states:

18    Invoking Bill of Rights Provisions
(1)    No right secured by the Bill of Rights may be denied or abridged, whether directly through the imposition of force or penalty, or indirectly through the withholding of privilege or benefit.
(2)    Any provision of the Bill of Rights may be invoked either as a defense to a civil or criminal proceeding or as a basis for legal or equitable relief against any actual or threatened violation.

If the President of the Marshall Islands fails to respect the Marshallese right to be free from quartering soldiers in times of peace, free from conscription, and be free from being punished by death, then the President is unconstitutional and must resign. And if they do resign, they cannot take it back because in paragraph (5) of Section 3 of Article V of the Constitution:

Where the President has tendered or is deemed to have tendered his resignation from office, that tender may not be withdrawn.

Unlisted Thoughts also notes that there is no provision for the President to suspend any part of the Constitution.

A weak President of the Marshall Island would react to the Nitijela Parliament Building burning down by taking away the right to freedom of thought, conscience, and belief.
A strong President will do the right thing.

Unlisted Thoughts strongly urges President Heine to not suspend the Constitution using powers, actual or imaginary, in her constitutional toolbox.

 Historian specialising in fires at legislative buildings Lucy Bell Quayle said:

“When your parliament burns down, you can either suspend freedom of the press or sit down and plan out how your next one will look.”

Former Speaker of the House of Commons the Right Honourable John Bercow said:

“Order!”

Former NSW Rural Fire Service salaried staff member Peabody Toole said:

“When the Houses of Parliament in Cape Town burned in 2022, it took everything in His Excellency Cyril Ramaphosa’s body to not suspend the Constitution of the Republic of South Africa and assume dictatorial control.

“I wish I could be that strong.”

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Media Contact: Norman Albanese
 

MEDIA RELEASE: Dorinda Cox Must Make Her Own Party And Leave It

Download link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1b7FENQBxQbIHw7RzvFwgNvJUgAn3l2fC/view?usp=drive_link 

Earlier today, Senator Dorinda Cox of the Great State of Western Australia made a move not on anyone’s bingo card by defecting from the Australians Greens to the Australian Labor Party.

A strong proponent of the Harrow Fairness Doctrine of “fair is fair” (see below), Unlisted Thoughts commends Senator Cox’s burning of any residual trust in her from her Greens voters by filling the Fatima Payman–shaped hole left in the 2022 class of Western Australian Labor senators. In absence of codifying the doctrine, Senator Cox bravely chose to defect and attempt a Reverse Payman.

However, Unlisted Thoughts would like to point out an error in Senator Cox’s technique. In order to perform a successful Reverse Payman, Cox needs to start a party and then defect from that party to the Australian Labor Party. By defecting from the Greens, Cox has pulled what can only be considered a partial Reverse Payman.

Unlisted Thoughts calls on Senator Cox of Western Australia to leave the Australian Labor Party, start her own party (she can contact us for further suggestions, but she can go with Voice Australia), and then defect and join the Australian Labor Party again. Such a manoeuvre would be considered a full Reverse Payman in addition to being a full Cox.

 

 

 A visual flowchart of the Payman manoeuvre

 

 

 

 

A visual flowchart of the theoretical Reverse Payman manoeuvre

 

Like any good politician who changes sides, Senator Cox leaves behind hours of footage of her swiftly condemning the government and her new colleagues. Unlisted Thoughts calls on bored people to create a video of the Greens Senator Cox criticising the Labor Senator Cox.

Senator Dorinda Cox has made history today. She ought to make history tomorrow and the day after—before it’s too late.

We failed to approach former Greens senator Rachel Siewert for comment because we are not journalists nor claim to be.

Pseudo-psephologist Tony Greenfell said:

“I did not have this on my bingo card.”

Man with a loud voice and opinions on the Australian Senate Dean Harrow said:

“The Harrow Fairness Doctrine must be embedded into our constitution as soon as possible. Senator Cox’s defection is the next best thing until we can get that done.”

Person who voted for Senator Dorinda Cox below-the-line in 2022 Kelly Williams said:

“I didn’t vote the Greens; I voted for Dorinda. If Dorinda wants to join Labor, then let Dorinda join Labor.”

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Media Contact: Tony Albanese

MEDIA RELEASE: Coptic Pope still alive

Download link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/13XDhbtQ6tBsyXMZgd-22jyaiKCBjtmEn/view?usp=drive_link

Unlisted Thoughts is proud to announce that the Pope of the Coptic Orthodox Church, Tawadros II, is still alive despite reports otherwise.

As the Coptic Pope of the Sea of Alexandria, Tawadros II is continuing to perform his duties of being the Bishop of Alexandria and the chairman of the Holy Synod of the Coptic Orthodox Church. 

While he is no Patriarch of Moscow and all Rus’, Unlisted Thoughts is confident that Tawadros II has the mental capacity and physical ability to perform his duties.

Unlisted Thoughts does not understand the hullabaloo of a Pope dying when the Coptic Pope can still stand on his own two feet. 

We have even sent a reporter to gently strike the Coptic Pope’s head with a silver hammer and then call out the Coptic Pope’s baptismal name three times. While the Coptic Pope did not take kindly to the hammer, he did respond on the second call of his baptismal name.

Unlisted Thoughts has not heard back from this reporter.

Unlisted Thoughts was saddened to learn that Pope Romanus Ongombe died in 2018. Our condolences are with his family.

We have been unable to confirm if the antipope Peter III, Supreme Pontiff of the Palmarian Catholic Church, is alive. However, we do not claim that he is deceased or that the supreme death of Pope Francis makes Pope Peter III the legitimate Pope of the Roman Catholic Church. Unlisted Thoughts fails to recognise Pope Peter III as the Bishop of Rome.

Unlisted Thoughts calls on interested readers to examine the Wikipedia list of popes who died violently.

Let’s give Papa some rest.

Religious scholar and non-practising Jain man Zilan Serokî said:

“It’s interesting to see world leaders mourn the death of Pope Francis when no-one, not one, have even picked up the phone to call Pope Tawadros II.”

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Media Contact: Michael Kevin Rudd

MEDIA RELEASE: Keep Auntie Australian – Day, Month, Year

Download link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1s7IpGJ9bUXtYVbcCMYQ-Q4Y2MkuDCmAw/view?usp=drive_link 

The Australian Broadcasting Corporation is one of the best things Australia has ever created. There is no dispute about this. However, Auntie has a horrendous tumour on the side of its brain: its style for dates.

As stated in the Australian Broadcasting Corporation’s style guide:

Our style for dates: February 9, 1985. Abbreviate top-of-the-hour times, but write others in full: 6am, 3pm, 9:30pm, 11:58pm. 

This is not on.

As described in the Australian Government style manual, the good people of the sunburnt and God-forsaken country of Australia use—and use it proudly while they’re at it—a format known as Day–Month–Year. 

This system is the most logical one when we’re not using ISO 8601 for there are days in a month and months in a year.

The Australian Broadcasting Corporation is one of the largest, non-Murdoch media companies in Australia. If Auntie is going to use the Month–Day–Year, then we will have a toxic influence on how we write dates. 

We call on the Australian Broadcasting Corporation to get it right.

Always keep Auntie authentically Australian. 

It’s not hard. Use Day–Month–Year like we have done above.

Man born on 1 October 1995 Oskar Vengris said:

“I expected this sort of trash from Murdoch, but the ABC? 

“I’m going to go back to SBS.”

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Media Contact: William Morris Hughes

 

 

MEDIA RELEASE: Forget About It – No More Amnesiac Protagonists

Download link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1L-52vaLR0Uu0dxCT6qgvkYZvgwt-nBn3/view?usp=drive_link

For too long, amnesiacs have been over-represented in video game protagonists. However, this is not because the video game industry respects the memory loss syndrome. Instead, this is because video game plot writers—the most oppressed group in society—are lazy, uncreative hacks who think the easiest way to let the player choose their character’s path is to make the character an amnesiac. 

By making the playable protagonist an amnesiac, game developers now have carte blanche to have both story mechanics and plot points lazily dictated to the protagonist.

Unlisted Thoughts and the Observatory for Video Games Plots and Stories, with the assistance of TV Tropes, believe that video game plot writers can do better. In the Observatory’s study of 16 video games where the protagonist is an amnesiac, they identified 12 alternative back stories that would have also worked. Additionally, they also suggest game developers can find better ways to integrate tutorial mechanics.

“I played Knights of the Old Republic. It’s brilliant, that is, but I just don’t see why my character just don’t know anything,” James ‘Frogert23’ Song said. Song suggests that games can take the Balder’s Gate 3 route of having some protagonists be amnesiac while others have established memories and backgrounds.

Gamers might not deserve better, but we think they should get better plot writing.

We grant an exception to games where the plot revolves around seeking the character’s memories. However, this can get contrived if the character turns out to be evil in the past or—heaven forbid—it was magic.

Enough is enough. We do not need more amnesiac protagonists.

We ask all video game plot writers to step up and do what’s right.

Acting Executive Director of the Observatory for Video Game Plots and Stories Ban Ki-Moon Please said:

“Amnesia should not be a tool for lazy writing. If we keep letting writers get away with it, I might need to give myself a memory deficit.”

TV Tropes Acting Senior Troper FuriousDragon said:

“It was innovative and new the first time, but having the reveal be that the action character in a full-body suit is a woman is tired and plays on old stereotypes. If you reveal that they’re an amnesiac—that’ll surprise me.”

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Media Contact: John Curtin
 

OPEN LETTER: NSW coat of arms on the NSW Supreme Court website

Unlisted Thoughts, on behalf of the Concerned Citizens of the Great State of New South Wales, has sent a letter to the Honourable Chief Justice Andrew Scott Bell in his capacity as the Chief Justice of New South Wales regarding the NSW coat of arms on the NSW Supreme Court website.

Unlisted Thoughts will ensure that this gets to the Chief Justice.

You can find the full letter here: https://drive.google.com/file/d/10VXo9Mlt2HxZK4KED3l21f2ZCdlgkdYW/view?usp=drive_link

You can also find the letter below:

Dear Chief Justice,

We draw your attention to the NSW Supreme Court’s website and the coat of arms currently being used. 

For your reference, I have pasted a copy of it (the previous depiction) below as it currently stands alongside the current depiction.

The depiction on the NSW Supreme Court’s website
(the previous depiction)

 

From https://supremecourt.nsw.gov.au/content/dam/dcj/ctsd/crest-logo/NSW_Crest.svg

 The current depiction of the NSW coat of arms

From https://coroners.nsw.gov.au/content/dam/dcj/ctsd/crest-logo/state_arms_2024_large_svg.svg

As Your Honour can see, the current depiction is in colour and features the words “New South Wales”. This version of the coat of arms is used on the websites of the Local Court of NSW, the Coroners Court of NSW, the District Court of NSW, the Drug Court of NSW, the Land and Environment Court of NSW, the Children’s Court of NSW, and the NSW Industrial Relations Commission.

I hope Your Honour can resolve this discrepancy immediately.

Further details on the NSW coat of arms are attached in Appendix A.

 If Your Honour has questions about the depictions of the NSW coat of arms, you can email us at unlistedthoughts@gmail.com.

Yours sincerely,

Concerned Citizens of the Great State of New South Wales

 

Appendix A

The current depiction of the NSW coat of arms was adopted by NSW courts in December 2024.

Below is the heraldic description of the NSW coat of arms:

Crest: On a wreath of the colours a rising sun each ray tagged with a flame of fire proper

Torse: Argent and azure

Shield: Azure a cross argent voided gules charged in the centre chief point with a lion passant guardant, and on each member with a mullet of eight points or between in the first and fourth quarters a fleece or banded argent and in the second and third quarters a garb also or Supporters On the dexter side a lion rampant guardant and on the sinister side a kangaroo both or

Motto: Orta Recens Quam Pura Nites